Monday, August 9, 2010

Went a little psycho.....

The first day has come and gone. She is officially a "big girl" now. She is officially spending more time with other people during the day than with me, as evidenced by her new phrases tonight of "oh yeah, baby" and "no way!" Hey, at least she didn't drop the F bomb or something....yet.

Here we are getting ready for the first day:

Getting a picture with our brothers before we leave:

I mean seriously? Could she be any cuter?

Here she is right before we left, coloring with "big Michael". Apparently, there are two Michaels. She likes them both. I think (on this staggered entry day) leaving her was harder for Isaac than me or Todd. When we were walking out, he kept saying, "I think I hear her. She needs me - we should go check on her one more time." So cute.

I think that today (first official start day) was harder on me than I expected. I mean, as I watched her walking towards her class amidst a bunch of fifth graders, she just looked so tiny. Something in me broke a little bit as I realized this is just the beginning of "letting go" that all parents go through. When that shift happened, I may or may not have become a little bit certifiable...... The other day upon leaving, I simply welled up; today there were big, fat crocodile tears. I considered going back to the school, picking her up, grabbing homeschooling supplies and making a run for it. I considered emailing her teacher to see if she actually made it to her classroom or ate her lunch or just to remind her one more time which bus to get on. I was a nervous wreck about her riding the bus home in the afternoons so I begged Todd to go follow the bus home. He (wisely) refused and tried to talk me off the ledge. And my shining moment was when I left for the bus stop at 3:50 (5 minutes after the school that is at least 12 minutes away officially lets out) and when I saw a bus driving down the street, I literally chased it thinking it was her and they didn't let her off. I was hauling ass with the dog and Isaac and yelling until one of the girls that got off of it informed me that that bus was from a different school. You know, South East HIGH School.

So, to sum up, we both survived. She had a blast and learned some new fun sayings, a lot of rules, and that "little Michael" is allergic to peanuts - and I......was a miserable wreck. And now we get to do it all again tomorrow.

I've heard it gets easier. I really, really hope that's true.
Because tomorrow when I'm chasing down buses full of much older students or city buses that happen to be passing by around the time she should be getting home, I'm pretty sure someone may call the cops.


  1. My heart breaks all over again visualizing this AND remembering Emma Grace's dad riding his big wheel to the bus stop, Jeff with the dog on his leash, me with the camera ....and me with the crocodile tears as I jumped up and down. It wasn't for excitement, it was to try to see him after he sat down. I looked like a crying kangaroo and I didn't care. This was before digital pics so I had to hold that image in my mind.
    It is HUGE that you survived! I take my teaching responsibilities VERY seriously for the very reason you state.....she will spend weekdays with another caring person all day. It's hard so hang in there and give Isaac my love too. He is an AWESOME brother :D

  2. Rachel - I love your blog! You have a wonderful sense of humor (sarcastic as it may be) and you are very good at getting it down on paper (computer).

    No, she could not be any cuter. I LOVE the pink converse with the dress!


  3. Thanks Bridget, but I don't think I'm sarcastic? :)

  4. oh i'll never make it. i have tears coming down my cheeks just reading about your day. wow.

  5. Love the coloring dude's big stud earring....